If one thing can be spoken as truth during this human experience, it is that what lives also experiences dying.  We see this cycle with the seasons.  We witness the leaves born from their buds to glow vibrantly until the fall when they decay and fall to the ground.  This truth also includes the process of regeneration and rebirth with the snow covered compost and nurturance of the soil beneath.

There are many beliefs about what happens when we die.  My goal is not to discount the belief of another, but offer insight from my experiences during my time as a human, as a Medium, and what I have been taught by Spirit.  Much like the cycle of nature, I see the existence of the soul in much the same way.  Like the bud on the tree, we have our incubation time in our mother's womb.  We push our way into this world, similar and yet unique to those around us.  We grow...we learn....we develop...we love...we experience...and at some point in the journey, we begin the transition to the Spirit world.

Many years ago, I worked as a Doula, helping new parents welcome their babies into the world.  We created plans for birth, which sometimes went as planned...and sometimes not so much.  We explored the answers to many questions and looked for ways to ease pan, discomfort and worry.  During our preparation visits, we would talk about rituals, family traditions and desires for new traditions.  We created a list of what to pack or have prepared, who to call for support and to celebrate when the time came for baby to be born.  Although it was an exciting time, it was one of fear or worry for many, as it was something that they had not yet experienced in this lifetime and could go in so many different ways.  The end result was most often a happy little family and my honour to write the birth story of how the wee one came into our world.

Over the past few months, I have reflected on this process and how similar it is to death.  It is merely a transition, from one state of being to another.  From the Spirit to the Physical and back again.

I remember as a child, I was shown a vision of the death of my Great Grandmother, my Nanny.  I saw my grown ups crying in a hospital and me being pushed back out of the room by a nurse.  My Nanny's Spirit came into the hall where I was crying and told me "See I am still here.  They just can't see me anymore.  I am always with you."  At this young age, I wish I could say that this brought me comfort.  Instead, I began to fear the finality of death and dying.  My Nanny was with us in the physical for a few more years, and when the time came, I was pushed to the hallway by a nurse and told that I could not be in the room.  Instead of crying, I remembered the vision and told Nanny that I looked forward to her visits.

My connection with Spirit allowed me to learn what I had not been taught in Sunday School.  I began to trust that the death of the body was not the death of my connection with my loved one, nor did it discount the experience that we had together.  Through connections on a Soul level, our loved ones still visit, attend special events and find ways to send us signs and insight.  They carry with them their personality and way of being, even if more enlightened.  They still learn lessons, send love and offer apologies where needed.  The Spirit self is an extension and different vibration of the physical self.

In Mediumship, it is through the senses that Spirit shares information.  I find it often fascinating that it is the senses that dissipate during the death process, and yet it is still our greatest resource in continuing the connection once the living transition has ended.  The information that I share is not from a medical perspective, but rather from what I have been shown by Spirit.  The body loses the sense of taste and smell, often around the time of the ability to swallow.  However, in the Spirit form, they share flavours and tastes to ignite memories.  The sense of touch moves from feet to head.  This is interesting as the feet are the closest to the root, the physical and to Mother Earth.  The further up we go in the body, the higher the frequency.  Spirit is a higher frequency than the physical form.  Often during readings, Spirit will make me aware of their hand being held, or their hair being fixed or a kiss on the cheek before passing.  It brings such comfort to know that they were aware when I share this with clients. Then the sense of sight shifts.  In my experience with Spirit, it is not that sight is gone, it simply moves to a different vantage point.  They begin to see with their third eye or soul, rather than the physical eyes.The last of the senses to shift is most often the sense of hearing.  I have heard many doctors and nurses encourage loved ones to keep talking, as they too understand the power these last words can have.  And although we see this as being of comfort for the soul ready to transition, it is actually for the living.  Spirit does not need the human voice box to communicate.  So many times, Spirit has validated the unspoken words as well as the ones that were spoken.  Spirit hears you, always.

The transition of life to death goes more smoothly when questions have been answered.  The questions may be scientific, for example about their body, illness or who will care for them.  It may be Spiritual, like "what will happen to me?"  Sometimes, we may not have the answers.  Sometimes dreaming a best case scenario is what we have to offer.  I remember when my "Grump" was passing away.  He was diagnosed with Cancer and given days to live.  He stayed a few weeks.  It seemed that once his questions were answered, he was able to transition peacefully.  He was one of the two men in my world that did not believe in or value my connection with Spirit.  However, in his final days, he asked me questions about who would be waiting for him, what was going to happen, and of course "Sammi, do you think they will ever win?"  He was talking about the Toronto Maple Leafs with that last one...my response was simply, "I don't know....but I will keep cheering anyway."  The answer not only satisfied his curiosity, but brought a smile to his face.

Another common phenomenon that comes up, is that our loved ones wait for us to leave the room or be distracted before they make their transition.  For the human, they express feelings of guilt or remorse.  However, every time that this has come up in a reading, the purpose has been to free the feeling of guilt.  Spirit shares that they do not want to burden their loved ones with good bye, that they want their loved ones to keep living.  Spirit always wants their passing to be met with peace and the knowing that their memory lives on.

Much like each birthing experience is unique, so is each dying experience.  Babies come forward having to learn how to walk, talk and express themselves in the human form.  Souls cross over to Spirit form and learn (or remember) how to express themselves too.  And you can continue your relationship.  It is just in a new way.

Here is my invitation, if it feels right to you.

1.  Understand what your view is on death.  What have you been taught?  What have you experienced?  Is it fear or love based?
2. Begin to see the end of life as a transition to a higher frequency of living rather than an ending.
3. Talk to your "Spirit People"!  Talk to your Live People!
4. Trust that you are supported always.  You are never alone.
5. The human experience is about living...that means that it is okay to make mistakes...
6. Create your own plan for end of life, just like we create a birth plan to welcome in our babies.  This may include talking to your loved ones, your religious or spiritual advisor or even a coach or death doula.  The supports are out there!
7. Grief is going to come forward.  It is a natural way of adjusting to a loss.  Planning and shifting the vibration of how we look at death can be a huge benefit to giving our human selves the space and opportunity to be in the now.